Hi friends! Welcome back to the blog as we talk about our most recent episode of Looking For The Middle: The Christian Girl’s Guide To Modern Dating. Today we are continuing our conversation around a survey we sent out a few weeks back. We sent this anonymous survey out to several guys in an attempt to figure out what christian men really think about dating and relationships. We asked them what they look for in a girl they want to date. We asked them what might deter them from asking a girl out. We even asked them what their biggest holdup was when it came to making the first move. There were some tough, personal questions on this survey, but the guys who responded did an incredible job of being honest, helpful, and straightforward in their answers. We both feel like we’ve gained so much knowledge and perspective after analyzing and talking through these survey results, and we hope as you listen to this two-part episode that you will do the same. We believe this is a conversation worth having, and we think it’s important to try to understand our brothers in Christ as best we can so we can navigate singleness, dating, and relationships well. So if you haven’t already, go listen to part one of What Christian Men Really Think About Dating, because we set the stage, give some context around the survey, and talk about the first half of the results in that episode. Then once you’re finished with that episode, go ahead and listen to today’s episode (part two). Just like we did last week, we’ve included a PDF of the survey at the bottom of this page so you can reference it while you’re listening and so you can see all of the questions we asked. One more thing we would encourage you to do is to use some of the questions from our survey with your guy friends. Ask them how they would answer these questions in an attempt to better understand them and learn about dating and relationships from their perspective. We have both found this survey to be a great tool for starting conversations with our guys friends about these topics, and we have only benefited from these conversations. We hope you enjoy this episode and that you’ll check back next week as we move onto talking about chemistry in relationships and how important (or not so important) it is! Happy listening! -K&B P.S. We just want to take a second and thank all of the guys who took the time to fill out our survey. We realize most of you might not see this post, but for those of you who do, thank you. Thank you for your honesty. Thank you for your transparency. Thank you for your wisdom and maturity. And thank you for the posture you had as you answered these questions in an effort to help all of the girls who listen to this podcast. Y’all are awesome and we are so grateful for you! Email: lookingforthemiddle@gmail.com Facebook: @lftmpodcast Instagram: @lftm_podcast Twitter: @lftmpodcast Credits: Hosts: Kristen Camp and Bethany White Music by: Adam Johnson Mixing and Editing by: Bethany White Logo Design by: Kristen Camp Content Advisors: Lindsay White, Melanie Hobson, Gabe Hartwig, and Matt Ziesmer ![]()
0 Comments
Hey friends! We have a question for you. Have you ever wanted to know how the male mind works, especially when it comes to dating and relationships? Have you ever thought about a guy you like or a guy you’re dating and asked yourself, “I wonder what he’s thinking?” If you answered yes to any of those questions, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! We have both asked ourselves these questions too many times to count. So we decided to go straight to the source to get some answers. We sent out a ten-question survey to a bunch of different guys asking them to talk to us about dating and relationships. We dug deep in an effort to get some clarity and understanding around what it’s like to date from a guy’s point of view. I (Kristen) am not gonna lie when I say I had no clue what to expect from the survey results, but boy was I encouraged! These guys didn’t hold back. They were so honest and transparent with their answers, and they opened our eyes to so many things that we didn’t realize before. I hope you’ll take the time to listen to today’s episode as we begin to dissect these results, because they were definitely worth talking through. Also, to give you some clarity as you’re following along, we have included a PDF of the survey below so you can see every single question we asked. One last thing to note is that we decided to break this content up into two episodes. There was just so much information to cover and we didn’t want to skim over anything. So be sure to stay tuned next week for part 2 of What Christian Men Really Think About Dating! We’ll talk to you then! -K&B Email: lookingforthemiddle@gmail.com Facebook: @lftmpodcast Instagram: @lftm_podcast Twitter: @lftmpodcast Credits: Hosts: Kristen Camp and Bethany White Music by: Adam Johnson Mixing and Editing by: Bethany White Logo Design by: Kristen Camp Content Advisors: Lindsay White, Melanie Hobson, Gabe Hartwig, and Matt Ziesmer ![]()
Hey friends!
It’s time for another episode! If you’ve ever made a “future husband list”, whether it was on paper, on your phone, or in your head, then this episode is for you! Bethany and I both made the first version of our lists when we were in high school, and boy have their been some edits and rewrites since then. We’ve learned a lot over the past few years about what’s really important, and what’s maybe not so important when it comes to looking for qualities in a husband. So we want to pass one what we’ve learned to all of our listeners, which includes you! We’ll talk about what was at the top of our very first list and whether or not those things have stayed at the top long term. We bring up things we didn’t even think to look for when we were in high school but are now realizing are basically necessities. We’ll discuss how much of our list covers things like height, interests, and physical appearance. And we’ll talk about how recently we’ve each rewritten our lists to be based on different passages of scripture. Bethany will take us through Ephesians 5, and I’ll talk about 1 Corinthians 13 (also known as the love chapter). Our hope for this episode is that you’ll begin to look at your own list and decide what your deal breakers are and what they aren’t. One of the best things I did in regards to my list a few years ago was organize it into two categories: non-negotiables and preferences, and I’ll explain what that looks like towards the end of the episode. So whether you feel like you’ve got your list nailed down or if you think it needs a major overhaul, bring that list with you for today’s episode and let’s work through this together! After you’re done listening, don’t forget to comment on our Instagram or Facebook and let us know what’s at the top of your list! We can’t wait to hear from you! Until then, -K&B Email: lookingforthemiddle@gmail.com Facebook: @lftmpodcast Instagram: @lftm_podcast Twitter: @lftmpodcast Credits: Hosts: Kristen Camp and Bethany White Music by: Adam Johnson Mixing and Editing by: Bethany White Logo Design by: Kristen Camp Content Advisors: Stephanie Buice, Lindsay White, and Melanie Hobson Hey friends!
Happy Wednesday and congratulations on making it halfway through the work week! That’s always something to celebrate right? We are really excited to (FINALLY) be releasing this episode. Ever since we recorded this one, we knew it would be a big hit, mainly because this is a question that we get asked a lot, whether it be from friends, listeners, or even ourselves. Waiting can be so difficult, especially when it seems like everyone around you isn’t having to wait as long as you are. So in Episode 1.6, we wanted to talk about how to wait well as a single woman. We’re going to break that down for you in two different ways. First, we talk about what it looks like when you’re in a season of waiting, and you have your eye on a particular guy. We answer questions like…
These are all such important questions when it comes to navigating dating. We have both experienced many trial and error situations when trying to figure out the answers, so we want to share them with you in hopes that you won’t make the same mistakes we did. And second, we talk about what it looks like to wait well while you’re single and you’re not interested in anyone specific. My mom has said for years, “Kristen, you can’t sit at home all day and wait for the UPS guy to deliver your husband to your front door. You actually have to go places and do things if you want to meet someone.” As much as I would try to prove her wrong, I figured out that she’s absolutely right! We have to be willing to put ourselves out there if we want to meet someone. But even beyond that, we can’t just spend this season of singleness in a waiting pattern, hoping for marriage to come along. I came to the realization not too long ago that I didn’t want to look back on this season of my life and regret waiting around and not doing anything because I was buying into the lie that life starts after marriage. Because that’s just NOT TRUE. There are so many opportunities and experiences we have available to us while we’re single, so why not take advantage of them? And that’s exactly what we want to address in this episode. We give you practical ideas of how you can spend your time and how you can enjoy this season to the fullest. We hope you enjoy this episode and that you finish it feeling encouraged to make the most of your singleness right now, whether you’re interested in someone or not. Plus, we would love to hear about all of the fun and exciting things you’re doing or interested in doing in this season of your life. So be sure to hit us up (is that still a cool phrase?) on Instagram or Facebook, or shoot us an email and let us know what you’re doing to make sure this season is memorable and meaningful! Happy listening! -K&B P.S. I mentioned a blog post I recently wrote that kind of goes along with this episode. You can read that blog post here! Email: lookingforthemiddle@gmail.com Facebook: @lftmpodcast Instagram: @lftm_podcast Twitter: @lftmpodcast Credits: Hosts: Kristen Camp and Bethany White Music by: Adam Johnson Mixing and Editing by: Bethany White Logo Design by: Kristen Camp Content Advisors: Stephanie Buice, Lindsay White, and Melanie Hobson Hey friends!
I can’t believe a week has already passed since our last episode! I feel like time is flying by right now. Anyone else feel that way? I was talking to my mom yesterday and she told me Thanksgiving is seven weeks from tomorrow and it blew my mind! But even though time seems to be speeding by, I’m kind of okay with it because that means you guys get to hear our next episode! Today we are continuing the conversation around Men You Should Want To Date. In this episode, we close out our list of six guys by talking about the final four. I won’t give away too much, but I will tell you which men we talk about:
As we break each of these guys down, we talk about how a guy’s selflessness weaves into not only your relationship now, but also your relationship and your family down the road. We talk about the importance of him having mentors and mentoring others. We discuss decision making and how to tell if you’re dating a “yes man.” And then we wrap things up with a conversation about communication, because we all know how important that is right? This was a great conversation for us to have and we hope it’s helpful for you whether you have a certain guy in mind that you’re interested in, or if you’re still looking around. We can both say with full confidence and humility that we have not always dated guys who exemplify these characteristics. We’ve had to go through some difficult circumstances and awkward conversations to figure these things out. So our goal is to talk through everything with you so you don’t make the same mistakes we did. We want you to ENJOY dating and we want you to date quality men who loved the Lord and who are striving to grow and mature every single day. So with that, we hope you enjoy our conversation as finish up our list of Six Men You Should Want To Date. -K&B P.S. If you think there are more men to be added to this list, let us know by either sending us an email or reaching out on social media. We’d love to hear from you! Email: lookingforthemiddle@gmail.com Facebook: @lftmpodcast Instagram: @lftm_podcast Twitter: @lftmpodcast Credits: Hosts: Kristen Camp and Bethany White Music by: Adam Johnson Mixing and Editing by: Bethany White Logo Design by: Kristen Camp Content Advisors: Stephanie Buice, Lindsay White, and Melanie Hobson Hi friends!
Happy Wednesday - or happy podcast posting day as we like to call it around here. If you’re a repeat listener, welcome back! But if you’re new around here, we are your hosts, Kristen and Bethany, and we are just two single girls trying to figure out how to date well as Christian women. And in order to start figuring that out, we’ve launched the podcast to start conversations around dating, relationships, singleness, and lots of other fun things! As I’m sure you noticed, the title of today’s episode is Six Men You Should Want To Date (Part 1). Over this episode and next, we are going to breaking down six different types of men that we would consider datable men. But before we jump into that list, we wanted to start off by making a clear distinction between boys and men. I’m sure most of us have dated a boy or two in the past when we would have rather dated a man. Both of us sure have! And it’s because of those experiences that we wanted to talk about why dating a man rather than a boy is so important. Our hope for you is that you will date (and hopefully marry) a man who loves the Lord, who doesn’t play games, who is others-focused, and who takes initiative. The last thing we want is for the opposite to be true where you date a boy who is immature, self-focused, passive, and lazy. We want today’s conversation to be helpful for you, giving you characteristics and qualities to look for as you’re considering dating someone now or in the future. Once we break down a few differences between boys and men, we jump right into the list of six men you should want to date. Even though we only cover two of the six men today, the two types of men we bring up are probably my favorite. We talk about dating a man who is confident and dating a man who leads. Before we recorded this episode, I asked a bunch of my friends to name three qualities they’re looking for in a guy. Every person I asked - whether they were young, old, single, dating, engaged, married - listed confidence as one of their three qualities. Clearly this is a very important quality to a lot of women (including the two of us), so we made sure we talked through it. We even break down how to tell the difference between a guy who is confident and a guy who is arrogant, because we know that can be tricky sometimes. Finally, we talk about the man who leads. And by that we mean a man who leads himself, others, and you. Plus we give some advice on how leadership from a man looks different in the context of dating and the context of marriage. So, there’s definitely lots to talk about and think through! So head on over to the Listen tab and check out Episode 1.4 - Six Men You Should Want To Date (Part 1) and then be sure to check back in next week for part 2! Once you get done listening to the episode, we’d love to hear from you! So head on over to our social media and let us know what other differences you think there are between boys and men. Or if you have any questions, feel free to shoot us an email. Email: lookingforthemiddle@gmail.com Facebook: @lftmpodcast Instagram: @lftm_podcast Twitter: @lftmpodcast That’s all for now! Thanks again for stopping by and we hope you enjoy this week’s episode! -K&B Credits: Hosts: Kristen Camp and Bethany White Music by: Adam Johnson Mixing and Editing by: Bethany White Logo Design by: Kristen Camp Content Advisors: Stephanie Buice, Lindsay White, and Melanie Hobson Hello friends!
Happy podcast day! It’s week two and we’re excited to share with you our list of First Date Dos and Don’ts. We feel like there are so many resources out there that tell you what not to do when it comes to dating, and then there are so many others that tell you what you should do. Unfortunately, more often than not, they don’t line up with each other. So today we plan to break that mold. We’ve got three things to not do on a first date and then three corresponding alternatives to replace them with. Don’t #1 - Don’t treat this like a job interview. Do #1 - Have some fun! It can be really easy to slip into a patter of just asking your date a bunch of questions so you can figure out as quickly as possible if this could work long term. You want to know where he lives, what his family’s like, how much money he makes (without actually asking him that), what his beliefs and morals are, and so on. But don’t spend the entire dinner grilling him and mentally checking off boxes in your head. Really try to get to know the person and have some fun! Ask more interesting, light hearted questions. Tell stories. Be curious. And just relax. You’re going to get to know this person better with time as the dating process progresses, so be patient and enjoy yourself! Don’t #2 - Don’t let him kiss you. Do #2 - Focus on the non-physical side of the relationship first (and make him work for it a little). To be honest, Bethany and I don’t completely see eye to eye on this one. This is a very strict rule for her, while I’m a little more lenient about it. BUT, one thing we do agree on is not letting the physical side of things dominate a relationship. Now, don’t get me wrong, physical attraction is VERY IMPORTANT. I’m a big fan of dating someone I’m attracted to. After all, if the thought of kissing the guy you’re dating makes you cringe, you might want to rethink dating him all together. That being said, don’t let your physical attraction outweigh the importance of getting to know the person sitting across from you. Plus, guys like the chase. Make him work for it a little bit. 😉 Don’t #3 - Don’t have unrealistic expectations. Do #3 - Keep an open mind to a second date, even if the first one is awkward. I’m guessing when it comes to expectations for the first date, you fall into one of two camps. Either you have super high, romantic comedy worthy expectations that this date is going to be wonderful and magical and perfect. OR, you have super low expectations and you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop and think this is going to be the worst two hours of your life. I fall under the first category, while Bethany falls under the second. Neither are great places to be. While it is good to have expectations, it’s important to keep them in check. You should expect to have fun on this date! You should not expect to know if you’re going to marry the guy or not. You should also not expect that he’s going to be horrible and that you’re going to die alone. See? Balance is important. And even if the first date isn’t perfect, don’t be afraid to give the guy a second chance, because you never know how things could turn out! During the episode I tell the story about my parents’ first date. It wasn’t great, and yet they’re married 30 years later. Case in point - you never know! I hope yall enjoy this episode and that you find some helpful tips as you’re figuring out how to date well, especially in the context of first dates. If you think you have a tip that could be added to this list, feel free to let us know on social media or send us an email. We’d love to hear from you! Happy listening! -K&B Email: lookingforthemiddle@gmail.com Facebook: @lftmpodcast Instagram: @lftm_podcast Twitter: @lftmpodcast Credits: Hosts: Kristen Camp and Bethany White Music by: Adam Johnson Mixing and Editing by: Bethany White Logo Design by: Kristen Camp Content Advisors: Stephanie Buice, Lindsay White, and Melanie Hobson Hi friends! Welcome to Looking for the Middle: The Christian Girl’s Guide To Modern Dating! We are your hosts, Kristen and Bethany, and we're just two single girls trying to start a conversation on how to date well as Christian women. Today is a very exciting day because our first episode has officially been released! We’ve made it super easy for you to listen to this episode. You can find us on your smart phone’s podcast app, iTunes, PodBean.com, or under the Listen tab on our website. So be sure to go check it out! In this first episode, we ask ourselves one very important question: “What do we wish was different about Christian dating?” We had actually asked ourselves this question a few weeks ago when we were sitting around eating ice cream with some of our girl friends. One conversation led to another (as is normal during a girls night in), and we all ended up exchanging stories of dating fails and relationship faux pas. As laughable and/or cringe-worthy as our stories were, there were several themes that started to emerge the more we shared. It was those themes that made Bethany and me realize we couldn’t be the only ones having these experiences. So that’s why we wanted to start a conversation about Christian dating through this podcast. If you think about it, there are kind of two ends of the spectrum in the Christian dating world. There’s the Tinder side of dating, where you’re hooking up with whoever, whenever, and wherever. And then there’s the “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” side of dating, which is the more conservative of the two. We felt like these types of dating get talked about a lot, but if your dating style is somewhere in between, the conversation sort of dies down. That’s where we come in (and that’s how we got our name)! We are “Looking for the Middle” of these two extremes, in hopes of figuring out how to date well as followers of Jesus. In future episodes, we’re going to be talking about everything from first date do’s and don’ts to technology etiquette in dating to actively waiting for dating and much more. And be sure to stick around because towards the end of this season, we’re going to be diving into the male brain and figuring out what their perspectives are on dating, and you’re not going to want to miss it! But for now, we’re going to start off with talking about how we wish dating as a Christian was different. Some of the topics we will discuss in this episode will be:
So, if you’ve ever thought about any of these topics, jump on over to the Listen tab on the website (or to your podcast app) and download the first episode so you can join in on our conversation! Also, we would love to hear from you about what YOU wish was different about Christian dating. So if you have any ideas, suggestions, or questions, here are a few ways you can get in touch with us: Email: lookingforthemiddle@gmail.com Facebook: @lftmpodcast Instagram: @lftm_podcast Twitter: @lftmpodcast One last thing - if you’re wanting to know a little bit more about me and Bethany (where we come from, what our hobbies are, our most embarrassing first date stories) go check out our Introductions Episode (Episode 1.0) where you can learn more about who you’re listening to! We promise even if you aren’t laughing with us, you’ll be laughing at us for sure. I think that’s it for now! Thanks again for stopping by and we’ll see you next week for another episode! -K&B Credits: Hosts: Kristen Camp and Bethany White Music by: Adam Johnson Mixing and Editing by: Bethany White Logo Design by: Kristen Camp Content Advisors: Stephanie Buice, Lindsay White, and Melanie Hobson Welcome to looking for the middle!If you're new around here, and you're tired of Tinder but you don't want to kiss dating goodbye, then you've come to the right place! This podcast started as a result of a late night girl talk session (as so many good ideas do) where we were discussing the challenges of dating in the modern world as Christian women. We knew we couldn't be alone in dealing with this and decided to take our thoughts to the airwaves and encourage other women who are walking this same road! We're hoping to give you a space where you can laugh with us (a lot) and cry with us (hopefully only as a result of the laughing) as we navigate this tricky 21st century dating arena. We will talk about guys you should want to date, guys to stay away from, online dating tips, wise time management in this single season and so much more. All of it with Christ and the gospel as our cornerstone. So, let's jump in and have some fun! ![]() Kristen Camp Hey y'all I’m Kristen! I’m a Georgia girl born and raised, and I have the accent to prove it. Three very important things you need to know about me are that my favorite sport is basketball, writing is my passion, and I will never turn down chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. I’m always down for a road trip with friends, but I also like just sitting down over a cup of coffee and talking about life and faith. I know Jesus has me on this earth for a purpose, and it is my goal to use the gifts and talent He’s given me to fulfill that purpose and to encourage others to do the same. My hope is that through this podcast, we can help you navigate dating and singleness well, regardless of where you are or where you’ve come from. I’d love to meet you so feel free to follow me on Facebook and Instagramso we can be friends! ![]() Bethany White Hey guys! I'm Bethany... A southern born, football watching, coca-cola drinking, country music listening, next vacation dreaming, all things Oreo obsessed kind of girl. Chasing the sunset on a summer night until the last bit of sun dips below the horizon is one of my favorite things. But, my true passion is the gospel! I want to be more like Jesus today than I was yesterday. I fall so short all the time, but that drives me back to the cross and my need for a Savior on a daily basis. I am so thankful for grace! I have lived in the metro Atlanta area for most of my life and am currently on staff full time at my church in Duluth. I love talking and hanging out on social media so this podcast gig is kind of perfect for me! Follow me on Instagram orFacebook and let's be friends! |
welcome to looking for the middleIf you're tired of Tinder but you don't want to kiss dating goodbye, you've come to the right place! |