​Hello friends!

Happy podcast day! It’s week two and we’re excited to share with you our list of First Date Dos and Don’ts. We feel like there are so many resources out there that tell you what not to do when it comes to dating, and then there are so many others that tell you what you should do. Unfortunately, more often than not, they don’t line up with each other. So today we plan to break that mold. We’ve got three things to not do on a first date and then three corresponding alternatives to replace them with.

Don’t #1 - Don’t treat this like a job interview.
Do #1 - Have some fun!

It can be really easy to slip into a patter of just asking your date a bunch of questions so you can figure out as quickly as possible if this could work long term. You want to know where he lives, what his family’s like, how much money he makes (without actually asking him that), what his beliefs and morals are, and so on. But don’t spend the entire dinner grilling him and mentally checking off boxes in your head. Really try to get to know the person and have some fun! Ask more interesting, light hearted questions. Tell stories. Be curious. And just relax. You’re going to get to know this person better with time as the dating process progresses, so be patient and enjoy yourself!

Don’t #2 - Don’t let him kiss you.
Do #2 - Focus on the non-physical side of the relationship first (and make him work for it a little).

To be honest, Bethany and I don’t completely see eye to eye on this one. This is a very strict rule for her, while I’m a little more lenient about it. BUT, one thing we do agree on is not letting the physical side of things dominate a relationship. Now, don’t get me wrong, physical attraction is VERY IMPORTANT. I’m a big fan of dating someone I’m attracted to. After all, if the thought of kissing the guy you’re dating makes you cringe, you might want to rethink dating him all together. That being said, don’t let your physical attraction outweigh the importance of getting to know the person sitting across from you. Plus, guys like the chase. Make him work for it a little bit. 😉 

Don’t #3 - Don’t have unrealistic expectations.
Do #3 - Keep an open mind to a second date, even if the first one is awkward.

I’m guessing when it comes to expectations for the first date, you fall into one of two camps. Either you have super high, romantic comedy worthy expectations that this date is going to be wonderful and magical and perfect. OR, you have super low expectations and you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop and think this is going to be the worst two hours of your life. I fall under the first category, while Bethany falls under the second. Neither are great places to be. While it is good to have expectations, it’s important to keep them in check. You should expect to have fun on this date! You should not expect to know if you’re going to marry the guy or not. You should also not expect that he’s going to be horrible and that you’re going to die alone. See? Balance is important. And even if the first date isn’t perfect, don’t be afraid to give the guy a second chance, because you never know how things could turn out! During the episode I tell the story about my parents’ first date. It wasn’t great, and yet they’re married 30 years later. Case in point - you never know! 

I hope yall enjoy this episode and that you find some helpful tips as you’re figuring out how to date well, especially in the context of first dates. If you think you have a tip that could be added to this list, feel free to let us know on social media or send us an email. We’d love to hear from you!

Happy listening!

-K&B

Email: lookingforthemiddle@gmail.com
Facebook: @lftmpodcast
Instagram: @lftm_podcast
Twitter: @lftmpodcast

Credits:
Hosts: Kristen Camp and Bethany White
Music by: Adam Johnson
Mixing and Editing by: Bethany White
Logo Design by: Kristen Camp
Content Advisors: Stephanie Buice, Lindsay White, and Melanie Hobson

​Hi friends! Welcome to Looking for the Middle: The Christian Girl’s Guide To Modern Dating! 

We are your hosts, Kristen and Bethany, and we're just two single girls trying to start a conversation on how to date well as Christian women. 

Today is a very exciting day because our first episode has officially been released! We’ve made it super easy for you to listen to this episode. You can find us on your smart phone’s podcast app, iTunes, PodBean.com, or under the Listen tab on our website. So be sure to go check it out! In this first episode, we ask ourselves one very important question: “What do we wish was different about Christian dating?” 

We had actually asked ourselves this question a few weeks ago when we were sitting around eating ice cream with some of our girl friends. One conversation led to another (as is normal during a girls night in), and we all ended up exchanging stories of dating fails and relationship faux pas. As laughable and/or cringe-worthy as our stories were, there were several themes that started to emerge the more we shared. It was those themes that made Bethany and me realize we couldn’t be the only ones having these experiences. So that’s why we wanted to start a conversation about Christian dating through this podcast.

If you think about it, there are kind of two ends of the spectrum in the Christian dating world. There’s the Tinder side of dating, where you’re hooking up with whoever, whenever, and wherever. And then there’s the “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” side of dating, which is the more conservative of the two. We felt like these types of dating get talked about a lot, but if your dating style is somewhere in between, the conversation sort of dies down. That’s where we come in (and that’s how we got our name)! We are “Looking for the Middle” of these two extremes, in hopes of figuring out how to date well as followers of Jesus. 

In future episodes, we’re going to be talking about everything from first date do’s and don’ts to technology etiquette in dating to actively waiting for dating and much more. And be sure to stick around because towards the end of this season, we’re going to be diving into the male brain and figuring out what their perspectives are on dating, and you’re not going to want to miss it!

But for now, we’re going to start off with talking about how we wish dating as a Christian was different. Some of the topics we will discuss in this episode will be:

• How to navigate when you start dating a guy and people quickly begin asking when you’re getting engaged.
• Why singleness isn’t a burden you need to overcome to lead a successful Christian life.
• That we wish the phrase “we’re just talking” didn’t count as a stage of a relationship. 
• Why you don’t have to know if you’re going to marry someone after you go to coffee for two hours.
• That it’s okay if you’re over the age of 23 and not married. 

So, if you’ve ever thought about any of these topics, jump on over to the Listen tab on the website (or to your podcast app) and download the first episode so you can join in on our conversation!

Also, we would love to hear from you about what YOU wish was different about Christian dating. So if you have any ideas, suggestions, or questions, here are a few ways you can get in touch with us:

Email: lookingforthemiddle@gmail.com
Facebook: @lftmpodcast
Instagram: @lftm_podcast
Twitter: @lftmpodcast

One last thing - if you’re wanting to know a little bit more about me and Bethany (where we come from, what our hobbies are, our most embarrassing first date stories) go check out our Introductions Episode (Episode 1.0) where you can learn more about who you’re listening to! We promise even if you aren’t laughing with us, you’ll be laughing at us for sure. 

I think that’s it for now! Thanks again for stopping by and we’ll see you next week for another episode! 

-K&B

Credits:
Hosts: Kristen Camp and Bethany White
Music by: Adam Johnson
Mixing and Editing by: Bethany White
Logo Design by: Kristen Camp
Content Advisors: Stephanie Buice, Lindsay White, and Melanie Hobson